Episode 34
· 39:24
Yapping!
Erika:Hello, this is Erika.
Edgar:And Edgar.
Erika:And we are the Yapping Schnauzers. We entertain you with yap worthy stories we find around the web. Today's theme is Manners or Madness. The first story is, Am I overreacting for asking my husband why he gave his mom my seat at graduation? My husband, 33 male, and I, 31 female, don't argue much, but this one has me quietly boiling.
Erika:I graduated with my master's last weekend. I worked full time, raised our daughters two female, and pulled night classes for two years to get here. Each graduate was given three guest tickets. I gave mine to my husband, my mom, and my sister. Cool.
Erika:Day of graduation, I'm walking into the venue with my cap half falling off and my husband waves me over with his mom next to him. I assumed she somehow got a ticket, maybe from another student. Nope. Later my sister texts, Where are you sitting? I said, Aren't you here?
Erika:And she replied, I didn't get in. No ticket. Apparently he gave my sister's ticket to his mom without telling me. His excuse? Your mom and your sister would have both cried anyway and my mom's never seen you graduate.
Erika:I told him that was disrespectful and he told me I was being overly sensitive and making a scene over a seat. I left dinner early, haven't really spoken to him since. He thinks I'm being called over something logistical, but I feel hurt, blindsided. And am I overreacting?
Edgar:So yeah, firstly it's just a little bit rude not to clarify who's coming because I guess everyone has expectations about who was able to go stuff. When they told OP one thing, I guess she was just blindsided completely with who actually came which was like OP's husband's mom.
Erika:Yeah, he just had no right to make that choice for her especially if it's her graduation, it's her moment. She should choose who should go. Why go ahead and say, well, I want my mom to go?
Edgar:Yeah, exactly. I imagine those three people that were originally supposed to go were what OP wanted to come.
Erika:Yeah, I mean, how would you have felt? Would you have acted the same way? Would you have been pissed or you would have just let it go?
Edgar:I feel like it would be a bit indifferent, but also I don't really like graduations like that. Like, I don't think they're that important.
Erika:How should he have handled it better?
Edgar:Well, since they're in a relationship, or they're married, they should have had better communication about who was actually going. It's like a very weaselly thing to be like, Oh, didn't tell you because you would have been pissed and stuff. Exactly. Sometimes that's an acceptable excuse, but in times like this where OP clearly cares about the graduation, he should have been more direct and more communicative about his intentions.
Erika:Well, he went behind her back. It wasn't just about communication. It was about him knowing that she was not going to be okay with it and lying to her and waiting for the last minute to change her plans for something important.
Edgar:Is this, like, divorce worthy for you?
Erika:That's so
Edgar:hard
Erika:Or
Edgar:this like a doghouse worthy?
Erika:It's bizarre.
Edgar:I say the very minimum is a doghouse worthy.
Erika:Of course, but so I guess it depends if he has done anything like this before.
Edgar:Mhmm.
Erika:You know, like if he has put his family first before mine. Like let's say if it's graduation, of course his family should go before yours, you know? That's, it's like common sense. But why is he adding his mother for this? Like I don't understand.
Edgar:Maybe the mother is very cool.
Erika:No, there's just no excuse to it. It's like, I don't, no. There's no excuse for what he did and I would definitely would have been really pissed with him. I wouldn't say divorce worthy, but I would have definitely ponder the thought.
Edgar:You could always just use AI to like, in the pictures, make it so the people who you wanted to be were actually there.
Erika:No. That's not the same thing. Okay, so the top comment is not overreacting. Your husband is awful. It was your special day and your choice of who to give the tickets to.
Erika:Your sister traveled all the way only to have to stand outside. He made your special day about him and his mom and then has the audacity to tell you that you're the one with the problem. It wasn't his choice to make and instead of admitting that and apologizing, he's victim blaming. 100%. Please stand firm, OP, because this isn't just about graduation, it's about respect.
Erika:If he doesn't respect you, then he's not marriage material.
Edgar:They're already married though.
Erika:Oh, well divorced. And then she edited it. This is actually worse than I thought because he must have planned this in advance and told his mom to be there to get to the venue. He let you and your sister believe that she was getting the ticket, but all in the while he already invited his mom and hadn't told you. You are married to a colossal asshole.
Erika:Run. That's true. He lied in order to get have this happen, he lied to his sister and her
Edgar:and told And mom probably. Because if I said, Oh, you were invited. So I feel like the mom isn't really at fault.
Erika:I hope not. Because sometimes you always think of good in people, but
Edgar:I feel like everyone here was like, well at least everyone invited, like, to travel a long way.
Erika:It doesn't matter.
Edgar:I mean, it matters in terms of the mom being innocent or not because she's just a fake We don't know
Erika:if she's innocent. We don't know.
Edgar:We don't know if the OP is innocent.
Erika:Yes. OP is innocent in this. Her husband is an asshole. And
Edgar:She knows she really knows how to pick them. Well,
Erika:it's hard to show true colors. So I would say it doesn't matter if whoever traveled whatever, it doesn't matter. It's about who she wanted to be there in her special day and he ruined that and lied to everybody. I'm hoping he lied to the mother-in-law, but who knows?
Edgar:So final verdict?
Erika:I would say he's the asshole. I would really think about your marriage and reflect.
Edgar:I say he's the asshole, but just every single mile that the sister had to travel, that's how many days he has to be in the doghouse for.
Erika:Nah, dude. I'm so annoyed with this because it's just, he, it's frustrating. I would say it depends if it's divorce worthy. If he's done something else like this, that he has done something that has put his family first besides OP, then I would say divorce worthy. But if not, this is his first offense, then I would really reflect and see if you want to continue.
Edgar:The next story is titled, Am I the Asshole for Getting Upset at My Boyfriend for Constantly Eating My Food? My boyfriend, 22 male, and I, 24 male, have been dating for a little over a year now. In general, we have a pretty good relationship with hardly any major problems, except for one on my end. He is constantly eating my food. We don't live together and work hectic schedules, so we eat out a lot.
Edgar:We cook too, but this problem isn't present when we eat in. Well this guy would literally eat his food and then help himself to mine. He won't ask me, he won't even look at me, but will just reach out to my plate and start eating. I was feeling nauseous a couple weeks ago when we went out for burgers, so I took the whole thing home. A few hours pass and I'm feeling better and I try to eat.
Edgar:And he literally grabs from my plate and just starts eating it. After four of his butts, it was more than halfway gone. He does this with drinks as well and would drink anything I have with me. My mom gave me an expensive bar of chocolate that I was saving and he just went to my dresser and opened it and ate half. It's driving me crazy that I can't ever fully have a meal or any kind of treats to myself because he wants to eat it all as well.
Edgar:I've talked to him about it and I've met with the you're overreacting, it's not a big deal. I thought we shared stuff. But last weekend we went to the movies and I ordered some snacks and a large drink. He ordered some snacks and a medium drink, so I took it upon myself and upgraded him to large. He tells me he only wants a medium, and I insist that he takes the large.
Edgar:He doesn't want one and tells the guy to make it a medium anyways. So a little later, halfway through the movie, he runs out of soda and grabs wine. He literally chugs like more than half of it and I'm lost in. I screamed at him at the feeler, Get your own drink, you should've gotten something large like I said. And everybody looked at us.
Edgar:He said it was very embarrassing and uncalled for in public. And I agreed to an extent, but it was the last straw for me. So, am I the asshole?
Erika:No. I think it's really annoying. He tried to accommodate his boyfriend and he just refused and then when things went the wrong way or he got pissed, the boyfriend's like that was so uncalled for.
Edgar:I don't get like especially with that feeder situation, why didn't he take the large drink? Clearly he's very hungry all the time.
Erika:Maybe he's trying to watch his weight.
Edgar:Maybe and failing.
Erika:Yeah, I think, I mean, you're always asking for food and you're always hungry. And to some extent, everybody, including your family and my family, know that you eat a lot.
Edgar:I know. Maybe too much.
Erika:I don't know where it goes, but you're still thin regardless of how much you eat. But, you know, we already know this, so I'm used to you. So I cater for you, so, you know, sometimes I, you don't eat this, I'm like, here, you could have this. Or I share some of it or half of this goes that, except for ice cream sometimes, I put my foot down for ice cream.
Edgar:I know, you barely give me any.
Erika:Because I love ice cream you should have got your own. I'm watching my figure. Yeah okay but you want my ice cream.
Edgar:I only want like the chocolate parts.
Erika:Yeah which is the best part exactly so no. I still say, I mean, if it's issues, like let's say you did that to me, I would have been flipped out too.
Edgar:In the theater?
Erika:Yeah, would have flipped out.
Edgar:Would you flip out even more if it was like ice cream in the theater?
Erika:Actually, know what, would have said no, you could go get your large drink. That's what I would have said. I wouldn't have screamed at you. I would have said no. This is my drink.
Erika:I'm drinking it. Go get your large drink.
Edgar:That's crazy.
Erika:Because if I wanted to order a large drink and you denied that and even told the waiter, no, I'm just gonna get a medium.
Edgar:And then end up drinking mine's anyways?
Erika:Yeah. And then trying to drink mine after I told you to get a large now. You you always I would have said go order your large drink.
Edgar:And he literally drink, like, half the large drink too.
Erika:I know, it's insane. Don't know. Think His
Edgar:gator would destroy him.
Erika:Yeah, he's also good like be I don't know if it's a lot of people eating like that either for anxiety or if it's also because it's like gluttony when you're not you're just eating because you just want to eat not because you're really hungry.
Edgar:Yeah gluttony.
Erika:I
Edgar:feel like maybe he's just bored because have you noticed like when you're in feeders you just like kind of like keep chewing on popcorn and not really noticing what you're eating.
Erika:And you keep going, yeah, 100%.
Edgar:I feel like it's sort of good, but also you're eating so much calories because it really adds up. When we have nights out with the kids or with friends, on Fridays we get three or four bags of popcorn. That's like a lot.
Erika:Excuse me, don't usually eat it all the time.
Edgar:I mean, know it's just us two, which is like in general. It's just like a popcorn fest.
Erika:Well I mean, in Costco they sell that big pack.
Edgar:Yeah, 10 pounds of popcorn. Straight to our niece's stomach. Her greed would destroy her.
Erika:She just loves popcorn with salt and lemon. If you guys haven't tried that, you should totally try it. It's so good.
Edgar:But don't put too much on it because she always puts way too much and then my hands dissolve into like no, the popcorn dissolves as my hand touches the popcorn.
Erika:Yeah, it's a little bit soggy. I would say just sprinkle it, you know? Don't necessarily drown in it.
Edgar:How about we just have popcorn with nothing in it?
Erika:No, I love popcorn and lemon or lime, whatever. Both are good. Okay, so the top comment is, Why are you with this guy still? He has no respect for your boundaries, belittles you and your feelings, and refuses to compromise. Let the asshole dump him for your own sanity.
Edgar:Is this dump boy thing?
Erika:Yes.
Edgar:You think
Erika:so? 100%.
Edgar:What did you have been together for like forty years?
Erika:I don't give to him. I don't know. I would say dump him. Because right now you're still a boyfriend. Do you think you could live like this forever?
Erika:Because I don't think he's gonna change. And he's showing you who he really is. Are you gonna be living like that for the rest of your life? I don't think so.
Edgar:OP's boyfriend isn't gonna live forever like this though? Or live forever.
Erika:Because he eats too much? Exactly. Well you don't know if he goes to the gym order. But regardless, don't think you would want to live like that for the rest of your life. I think it's very frustrating.
Erika:You're gonna lose hair. You're gonna
Edgar:He's already losing hair, I can tell.
Erika:You're gonna get white hair from me. And you know, just save your sanity, OP. Dump his ass.
Edgar:So that's your final verdict?
Erika:Yeah, how about you? What's your final verdict?
Edgar:Just keep a stache.
Erika:No, because he's an adult, he should know. No, he's not a child. He should be accounted, you know, be accountable for what he's eating and then be an adult for it, not just accommodate him every single time. That's exhausting for the other person.
Edgar:Maybe it's a trauma response.
Erika:It doesn't matter. If he doesn't want to deal with that, then he doesn't have to. Nobody has to deal with your trauma.
Edgar:Yeah, I mean it makes sense. He looks like he's on edge anyways. Probably not a good match.
Erika:No, probably not.
Edgar:Mm-mm.
Erika:Okay, so the next story is, gave away free cupcakes at work. Got told they weren't inclusive enough. I bought two dozen cupcakes in the office last Friday. Just a nice mix I baked at home, vanilla, chocolate, a few sprinkles. Left them in the break room with a note that said, Free, enjoy.
Erika:About an hour later, someone sent a company wide email saying, While I appreciate the gesture, it would have been nice if they were gluten free or vegan options, so everyone could enjoy. Then added aggressive line like, Let's try to be more mindful when sharing food in common spaces. They were free. I'm not a bakery. I didn't realize bringing cupcakes made me head of dietary inclusivity.
Erika:Next time I'm bringing nothing but a locked Tupperware and a spoon, for me only.
Edgar:I feel like with that kind of response, I hope we should have responded by making just gluten free like cupcakes but it's not actually gluten free.
Erika:No, stop. Some people are allergic. You could kill someone. What you mean?
Edgar:Feel like that's the worst way to die. It's painful, but just imagine your tombstone died of gluten. A funny
Erika:dude. You should not do that. I think he just sometimes it sucks being nice because people are like this. Mhmm. Like have you ever been nice to somebody and then it was like getting slapped?
Edgar:Yeah.
Erika:What? What did you do?
Edgar:I treat Selena, the dog, really nicely and she still bites me when I try to give her kisses. In the face, too.
Erika:Don't say that.
Edgar:I love her still.
Erika:No, she doesn't like being, well, she got neutered and she has really sensitive belly and she doesn't like anybody kissing it. She loves belly rubs though. She loves it. She goes to you, turns around and then you see her belly like, Give me the rubs. But she doesn't like anybody kissing it except for me.
Erika:And you're jelly and you want to kiss her belly and I tell you all the time, don't do it. Don't do it and you don't listen. So that's why she she doesn't bite you, she almost bites you. She growls at you.
Edgar:Yeah, she gives me horny shots.
Erika:Yeah, but she doesn't bite you bite you. She's very sensitive with her belly.
Edgar:And that's a time when I felt betrayed for being nice.
Erika:She loves you, but she just doesn't like you being kissed in the belly, except for me. Alright, so top comment is, one time at work I was just craving sugar or something junk food and the vending machine had this huge bag of gummy bears. I bought it and got my rubbish and then asked my coworker if anybody wanted some. A few did, but one person gave me a stink face when I offered her and announced she was diabetic and next time I should consider offering a healthy treat. I simply said, no worries, I won't offer you next time.
Edgar:That's crazy. What is that?
Erika:I'd be like, you know what?
Edgar:Some people are just born miserable.
Erika:I would, this is what, I don't like to be nice to, or I think I'm a very nice person, but sometimes you have to have a limit.
Edgar:Mhmm.
Erika:And when you're nice to people because people just are assholes and they don't deserve it. Okay, so what's the final verdict?
Edgar:I say that OP is not the asshole for trying to give treats to everybody but happens to not bake gluten free treats.
Erika:Yeah, I mean, no.
Edgar:That's like such a niche thing to make too. And it's like very difficult, from what I've heard.
Erika:Yeah, exactly. Okay, another top comment was, If she wants healthy treats, she can bring her own snacks. That's it. That simple.
Edgar:The next story is titled, I didn't let my husband eat my sandwich. My husband and I were chilling on the couch and I mentioned I was hungry. I placed an order from one of our favorite sandwich shops. I asked him three times about ordering if he would like one as well and he said no three times. And he had just had breakfast and wasn't hungry.
Edgar:The sandwich arrived and I cut off a small bit of it to eat then and save the rest for later. I don't have a large appetite. I'm kind of a grazer, like a cow.
Erika:Oh, it's, I don't know, it's kind of weird.
Edgar:Weird way to describe your eating habits.
Erika:But
Edgar:I take one bite and he says, Oh, I want a bite of that. And I said, Why didn't you order one yourself? Then he said, I wasn't hungry until I smelled yours. That's very convenient for him. And I ended up letting him have about three bites of mine and told him to order his own.
Edgar:I don't like sharing food unless it's planned and he knows this. We've been together for ten years and I literally have to hide snacks from him because he will find them and eat them because I don't eat all of it at once. He orders the sandwich. It's a thirty minute delivery and he wants another bite of mine. And then I said, No.
Edgar:Now I'm the crazy selfish hypocrite who won't share food and he has now brought up every meal we've ever had the past two weeks as an example of his food generosity. Mind you, every meal was planned to be shared. Now we aren't speaking. Am I the asshole?
Erika:Absolutely not.
Edgar:I mean, they don't really seem that compatible. We always share food, either planned or not, and I feel like we're okay with it. And I feel like that's something good, happy couples like doing in general. Like if you really didn't like the person, you wouldn't like sharing the food or you wouldn't make the sacrifice or compromise to share food.
Erika:It's not just about that. Think it's just all the time, you you can't change something that you don't like. So she is willing to compromise and plan when to share the food, which is fine. Yeah. But when there's no planning and he still wants to share, and she did give him three bites, And now he has to wait thirty minutes for his food, but he wants to continue eating her food.
Erika:Doesn't that frustrate you?
Edgar:It's like some of these people have like two thoughts going on in their head and they don't communicate with each other.
Erika:I guess. I mean, if she would have said, 'Okay, so you have another bite then I have three bites from your sandwich.' We share your sandwich.
Edgar:Exactly, yeah. But, I mean, she didn't think well saying that, but I feel like OP's husband or whatever probably wouldn't like the idea.
Erika:Yeah.
Edgar:Because he's a hungry little boy.
Erika:Something else. Yeah, I just, it's frustrating because all he had to do was order and said, Yeah, just order me one, two. That's all it was.
Edgar:All he had to do was fast. No. All had to do then this would have been avoided.
Erika:All he had to do was order and say, Yeah, just order me a sandwich, he would have had his own sandwich. Crisis averted. But he said no, repeatedly. Yeah, I don't think OP is the asshole here. The husband is.
Erika:The top comment is, Not the asshole. Does he have issues with food or is he selfish and self assured by nature? OP responded, He eats everything he likes in the house because it's there. He wants it. I can leave a package of chocolates in the fridge for three months and have one every week or so.
Erika:He eats the whole package in a day. Why I have to hide my snacks from him? That's crazy.
Edgar:I know.
Erika:Would be
Edgar:so That kitchen must be on lockdown.
Erika:Like that's, I mean, how do finish the whole package?
Edgar:He must be like three hundred, four hundred pounds
Erika:at Oh sometimes people have fast metabolism so, you know.
Edgar:But he's eating like junk food.
Erika:Maybe he's a, so then OP, somebody said, So is he completely selfish then or is it a compulsive eating thing? He's a compulsive eater. I have to hide my snacks for him. If he sees it, he eats it. And I have a really big issue with my food that I have saved for later disappearing.
Erika:I'm just ordering two next time.
Edgar:Dang. The OP's boyfriend's eating habit is going to financially ruin them forever.
Erika:Or his health. Like, eating like that is not healthy for you either.
Edgar:Is it your final verdict?
Erika:No, I would say nah, she's not the asshole. He needs therapy
Edgar:for
Erika:compulsively
Edgar:He needs a diet.
Erika:Alright, so the next story is, I lied on my resume to get a job I wasn't really qualified for and now I'm actually good at it. I was broke, desperate, and tired of all the rejection emails. One night I just snapped and rewrote my resume like it was a fanfic character. At a scale that didn't actually have, projects I never did, even made a fake consulting gig that sounded fancy, but was really just helping me, helping my cousin with a site once. I applied a bunch of jobs, got some interviews, learned some buzzwords, watched a ton of YouTube tutorials, and just hoped no one would dig too deep.
Erika:And then one company actually hired me. Remote job, decent pay, full benefits, I almost passed out. LOL. First month was rough, imposter syndrome, googling everything, constantly panicking whenever someone Slacked Slacked me?
Edgar:Yeah, Slacked us like a chat app for work.
Erika:Oh, okay, I know that. But I kept showing up, kept learning, faked confidence until I didn't fake anymore. Fast forward like six months and now I'm actually a good worker. Like, people come to me with questions. I hit my KPIs.
Erika:I trained the new intern last week. My boss called me a core member, and I almost spit my coffee out. I'm still weird about how it started, but also if I hadn't lied, I would have never gotten the chance, and now I'm not really lying anymore. I am that person. Just took a weird detour to get here.
Erika:Maybe the whole system's broken if the only way to get in is to pretend you already belong.
Edgar:Yeah, I agree with that sentiment. Like also the interview process is kind of broken in general. Do you know what Cluely is?
Erika:No, it's not.
Edgar:So yeah, this is big on tech Twitter, but Cluely is an app that this guy made and this guy, he just dropped out of Columbia University. What he did was he went into the college in the search to find a co founder and then he created this product where he would go into detectional interviews like Google, Amazon, and you have basically AI in the background telling him all the answers to the interview questions. So all you gotta do is just repeat back and write the code that the AI tells him to do. And he was able to get five job offers for that. Oh wow.
Edgar:But as soon as they found out all of the jobs were sending their offers and then Columbia kicked him out of college.
Erika:That's crazy.
Edgar:And now he has his own company called Clueli, where he's basically creating that cheating service, but for everything. He wants to do it for dates, for when you're talking to your accountant.
Erika:That's great.
Edgar:Yeah, but that's a valuable lesson. The system as it is isn't really working anymore and if someone bullshitter like him could get in and still do reasonably well, I feel like we're not measuring the correct thing. Because maybe he had it in him to kind of grind it out, you know?
Erika:Yeah, I mean as long as you're a hard worker, I feel like you could learn anything and you're a fast learner. Don't think you should be limited. But it's just, I mean he got lucky.
Edgar:He got super lucky. But yeah, think he has like, I feel like he cares enough to want to look up all these things and not be a burden to his team and stuff.
Erika:Yeah, because he cared. Exactly.
Edgar:That and he probably got paid super well, or more better than he was paid before, so he didn't want to lose that.
Erika:And he had full benefits too, it's hard to find a job to It's like literally perfect. So the top comment is the most inspiring thing I've heard in the last year. If only everyone was such a self starter, resourceful, and a go getter. And next is starting your own business on the side until it makes more than you make. Then hiring yourself out of work of the company you built or automating it using AI if possible.
Erika:Go after it and go get it. I believe in you. That's a nice comment.
Edgar:Yeah, if you can like do this, like go to a job that you have like no knowledge qualifications for and then succeed in it, you can probably do most of the things. Exactly. With enough determination.
Erika:Remember how you were talking and you were telling me that school makes you to be a worker but not a leader?
Edgar:Yeah, that and also it doesn't teach you to be like a problem solver or a creative. I feel like a lot of kids these days aren't creative anymore. They need like some sort of stimulus or they need to like see something in order to imagine it. Don't you remember when you were younger when you had like your own toys and you had to imagine your own scenarios or your own things to keep yourself entertained?
Erika:Yeah, I mean, we do use technology way more than we used to before. I mean, we didn't have tablets, we didn't have computers or whatever or Game Boys like that. We just had to be.
Edgar:Exactly, yeah. But the thing is we have all this technology now, but we're able to at least do a little bit more of it. We just use it as an extension of ourselves because these days that's all they have from as soon as they're able to walk, they have that.
Erika:I know.
Edgar:So that's all they are.
Erika:Yeah. I think it's good and bad because then, you instead of using you should use AI or whatever, the computer, to enhance your learning or help you learn something, not just use AI for everything to give you answers because then you're not learning anything. You're not growing. You're not doing something new.
Edgar:You're basically just borrowing all that knowledge and all that skills, but it's not skills and knowledge you actually have.
Erika:Exactly. So I think it's important to use technology, not replace your thinking and critical thinking skills with it.
Edgar:Mhmm, that's why I feel like a lot of kids these days are kind of screwed. Because we're in a new paradigm with AI and all this technology was just being thrown at kids and young people's faces and we'd have them figure out a good system for them to take it in appropriately and responsibly.
Erika:Yeah, definitely.
Edgar:So I guess we'll see in ten, twenty years if everyone turns how it goes, if they turn out socially awkward or if they become 10 times more awesome than we ever could be.
Erika:Yeah, I mean, could go both ways. So what's the final verdict for you?
Edgar:For this? I think, yeah, he's I don't
Erika:think it's It's not I'm an asshole story. It's just more like I have say.
Edgar:I agree with him. You should lie on your resume in order to get your job. That is legal advice.
Erika:Wouldn't say lie. I would just say, I mean, if you had experience of somehow, you should put it in your resume.
Edgar:Yeah. If you wanna be like this guy and have like a remote job that pays well and you don't have to worry and people respect you, you can also lie on your resume.
Erika:I'm not encouraging lying. I'm I'm not doing that.
Edgar:Nephew is listening this. New strategy, guys.
Erika:No. No. No. My nephew's listened to this so I can't be can't be supporting lying so I'm not doing that.
Edgar:The next story is titled, Am I the Asshole for Asking My Friend's Boyfriend to Carry My Groceries When I Was Wearing a Wrist Brace? So I, 30 female, was sleeping over at my friend's for the weekend. I had surgery on my wrist a couple months ago. On bad days they wear soft brace and I offered to go get a few things for breakfast and came back with life free grocery bags. The boyfriend, 32 male, opens the door for me, sees my arm full and I'm like, Can you bring these to the kitchen please?
Edgar:And he said, Yeah of course. And I handed them over to him. No weird vibes, we all had lunch, laughed, and even went out that day. That night however, my friend informed me I was really inappropriate by having asked him to do physical stuff for me. And she added that he has boundaries about doing more mundane favors for other women too, like food deliveries and gets uncomfortable about it, but is too polite to refuse.
Edgar:And it sounded like she made it as if I had disrespected their relationship. Honestly I figured that was just a polite question to ask. He wasn't saying anything or reacting strangely. I danked him like three times. Now I feel awk as F and I don't know if I overstepped.
Edgar:You mighty asshole.
Erika:No girl, you're not.
Edgar:This is like a weird dynamic. Like I'm sure like there's some like couples that look at this and like, oh this is cute, this is like having boundaries and respecting your relationship, like this is it. But for me this is not it.
Erika:No no, I don't think having boundaries and respecting each other is not a bad thing. I think that's great. But this type of boundaries is kind of out of whack for me.
Edgar:I know. I feel like there was no romantic tension in this. It was just like, Oh, I really can't do this by myself because I have a wrist brace. Can you just help me for a second or two?
Erika:She had wrist surgery not too long ago.
Edgar:Exactly, and this couple knows this already. But I like to think that the boyfriend wasn't actually uncomfortable with this. I feel like the girlfriend probably saw this and was like, why'd you do that to her? Why'd you do that for her? Do you like her?
Edgar:Then just broke them.
Erika:Probably jealous, yeah. She's jealous type.
Edgar:Super jealous? Because I imagine the boyfriend person probably trying to make a move. It didn't look like he was trying to make a move.
Erika:No, he saw her with three bags, a wrist brace, and she wanted to help. There's nothing wrong with that.
Edgar:I know. What was the alternative? Just look at an OP struggling and be like, Damn, sucks to be you.
Erika:Exactly, I don't get it.
Edgar:I feel like that would have been red flags for OP's neighbors or whatever, a couple of friends.
Erika:Yeah, then it would have been like, Yeah, your boyfriend just saw me struggle and didn't say anything.
Edgar:Yeah, it's a little bit psychotic actually.
Erika:Yeah, so the top comment is, Not the asshole. I'm willing to bet that he didn't even have a problem with it. Your friend did. What he did literally didn't even take that long. She's totally overreacting.
Erika:And then OP actually responded, Exactly. He grabbed a few bags, walked to the kitchen, and that was it. I didn't think asking for help would turn into some kind of betrayal. Yeah. She has problems.
Edgar:Exactly, yeah.
Erika:Poor guy. If he's like, if she's having issues like this, I can't even imagine about other stuff. Like, you can't even look at girls, like, you can't even stare at them, you can't even, like, be in some certain feet with them, like, it's crazy.
Edgar:That house isn't a home, it's his prison.
Erika:He probably, the poor OP, OPs, no, I think the boyfriend needs to think about the relationship and see if it's worth it.
Edgar:A final verdict?
Erika:I don't think she's overreacting or that she overstepped anything and she's not the asshole.
Edgar:Yeah, OP was definitely not acting in the wrong, and neither was a boyfriend. I think this is all onto the girlfriend's issues.
Erika:So, next story is, Should I have called the police? Okay, so I, female, 16, was in a walk in the forest near my house. Legit, don't even live two miles away from it. I've walked there for months and done it almost daily. Today I walked and I was on a call with a friend while I was walking.
Erika:Some man who looked about 50 years old, which I've never seen before, walked over to me and said, Hey, you look pretty. Just so you know, if anything happens to you out here, no one will hear you. I backed off and he said, I don't want to make you uncomfortable, which honestly made me even more scared. I walked off and asked my friend on the phone if I should call the police, and I did. The operator was nice, but the second he made me talk to the police made me wonder if I should have called or not.
Erika:The police sounded clearly annoyed by the call and just told me to go home if I could. I'm safe now. Did I overreact?
Edgar:I do not think she overreacted. I feel like that's like a very creepy thing to have spoken to you.
Erika:Yeah. A 50 year old man say that to a 16 year old.
Edgar:That's weird.
Erika:Oh, you're really pretty and you shouldn't be here, like walking here. Like, if something happens to you, no one can hear you. Why you I would have ran so fast, I would have called the police, ran fast, I would have never gone walking. And also like, I think when you have a routine, you should also be careful because you just never know what type of creeps are watching you. You should always do something different, especially if you like walk every day at a certain time, change your time, change your like route, it's just in case.
Erika:Always keep it different, not a routine where they know when you're going there or they know where you're gonna be. And always, I would say buddy system. Always go walking with your boyfriend or somebody if possible, or even with your dog. So I think it's great to be fit and all that, but you have to always think about your safety.
Edgar:Yeah, that's why I have no schedule. Oh my
Erika:god. Yeah, but you're something else with that. But I think it's important to also, you know, I'm glad that she called the police even though the police didn't seem like it was much of anything. But she did her due diligence and maybe if somebody else called around that time then they know it's not just one person that's being harassed or whatever.
Edgar:I feel like it's just a dangerous situation in general for that community because they have someone like that walking around within it And like eventually he's gonna act up and do something.
Erika:Yeah, I mean, I used to run all the time by myself when I was in my early twenties, 18, 19, 20, whatever. I used to run all by myself in like the forest or whatever and now I think about it, now that I'm like older I'm like, I was crazy.
Edgar:I know.
Erika:Like I should have, and I used to run like an early morning or an afternoon all by myself and I just been like, my parents used to tell me, Don't do it! And I just like, No. But now that I'm older I'm like, Yeah, I definitely wouldn't go by myself anymore. Okay, so the top comment is, You didn't overreact at all. That was creepy and threatening as hell.
Erika:Trust your gut every time and keep calling stuff like that and screw how the cop feels about it.
Edgar:Yeah, don't know what the other cop was thinking. Probably it was just like too bored or just like too lazy to do anything actual.
Erika:Just some people, some cops just don't care. Just like how you have good cops that do what they need to do, you have cops that could care less.
Edgar:Yeah, which is unfortunate. Yeah. So final verdict?
Erika:You did not overreact OP, I'm glad you called the police and just keep aware of your surroundings and your safety.
Edgar:Yeah, agree, Jia. Just be extra careful, especially with this guy lurking around.
Erika:Yeah, especially two miles away from her house. I hope he didn't follow her or anything like that. That's so scary. So that's all the stories we have today. Thank you for tuning into this week's episode.
Erika:Check out our website, wwwyappings.com, and join our mail list for updates. If you love our podcast and want to support us, subscribe and share to your friends and family. We would appreciate it so much.
Edgar:Also, we have a Facebook group called AITA Relationship and Family Drama, linked in the description. Join so you can share Am I Diassos posts you like or share your own stories for us all to judge. We may even read a few posts in one of our episodes if you're lucky. And also one thing, I was in a hackathon the past month and I created this app called tini.la or tinylaw, which is a tiny stage for sharing your links and collecting fans, where you build your audience and your email list in seconds. So I will attach in the description of this episode a link to the website and starting tomorrow until fourth of July weekend we have a promotion where you can get $10 off for the yearly subscription.
Edgar:So again, dollars 10 off coupon in the description and check out Tiny La, spelled tini.la and we'd love your support!
Erika:Thank you! Bye!
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