Episode 24: Fizzy Lies & Sparkling Regret - Sippin’ the Tea on Reddit’s Wildest Confessions

Intro: 00:00

Yapping!

Erika: 00:02

Hello, this is Erika.

Edgar: 00:04

And Edgar.

Erika: 00:05

And we are the Yapping Schnazuers. We entertain you with the app worthy stories we find around the web. So today's theme is emotional fakery. The first story is titled, Am I Overreacting for Finding Out My Boyfriend's Sister Wasn't His Sister? As of today, I am very upset and rethinking my entire three years relationship.

Erika: 00:31

But a part of me is also wondering if the situation wasn't that serious. So read it, I'll let you be the one to judge. You've given good advice before, trust you'll do it again. For the entire three years my boyfriend who we'll call Dustin has had his sister who we'll call Kay. Dustin and Kay have always been close.

Erika: 00:53

Kay always comes over here and hangs out with Dustin. Dustin, not me, in fact, I'm convinced she hates me. But more on that in a moment. Anyways, Kay and Dustin always go over each other's houses, go out to dinner and once even went on vacation without me. Every single time Kay is around she acts like I don't exist.

Erika: 01:16

I talk to her, she ignores me. She and Dustin hang out, I am quite literally a third wheel. Now I never complain because I always thought it's his sister, family comes first. Dustin at one point even canceled our date plans to go bowling with Kay. Yes, without me.

Erika: 01:34

I decided to visit the old neighbor lady whom I help with yard work. And I'm telling her about Kay. Mind you, this lady has lived in this town since she was born. She knows everybody. Usually I don't confine in her about my life, but today was a bad day and I needed somebody.

Erika: 01:54

I tell her about Kay and as I'm describing her, the lady cuts me off and says, that's not his sister. She said that Kay is her coworker's daughter and has no siblings. She has met Kay several times and is very close friend with the coworker. Came home to his bags packed at the door. I kicked him out and told him we were done.

Erika: 02:19

Dustin went on and on about how Kay is his best friend. He just didn't want to lose her, all this and that. The thing is Kay and Dustin really did seem like a brother and sister type. Aside from spending almost every day together, I never thought that anything romantic or sexual was happening between them. But I still found it very unacceptable.

Erika: 02:41

Now I am being slammed by Dustin and his family saying, I'm way overreacting, need to talk it out, etc. So Reddit, what do you think? Am I overreacting? I forgot to add Dustin's parents are dead and he rarely speaks to the rest of the family. He says yet now that they're coming after me.

Erika: 03:00

So I'm wondering if that was a lie also.

Edgar: 03:03

So many lies. He's getting caught in the middle of.

Erika: 03:06

That seems so complicated. Girl, just let him go. It's not worth it.

Edgar: 03:12

Yeah, it's too many lies and we don't even know who this chick is. Exactly. Wait, so does the girl know about her? About OP?

Erika: 03:22

Yeah, they literally hang out together and it's like she's the third wheel instead of the friend.

Edgar: 03:29

That's very suspicious. I

Erika: 03:32

don't trust it. I honestly, they maybe just thinking about it this way that you know they're so close and sibling like that they don't want to try to go out with each other because they don't want

Edgar: 03:44

to lose each other because you

Erika: 03:45

know if they end up breaking up, it's not gonna work out after. So maybe that's why they don't want us to take this next step. She's basically, OP is the third wheel here. And I think she should just break up with him honestly. You're not married, it's only three years, I mean it's a waste of your time, but OP, do you really wanna be in this type of relationship?

Erika: 04:07

Would you be, what do you think? Would you you let it go? Would you forgive him or her, basically? No. You would actually break up?

Edgar: 04:16

Yeah.

Erika: 04:17

That's a miracle. You usually give Benny chances. But I think it's a lot of lies I think to be forgiving, right?

Edgar: 04:24

So

Erika: 04:26

there is an update and it says, Turns out Dustin lied about everything. His mom is alive. Yo!

Edgar: 04:35

I feel like the entire story was alive at this point.

Erika: 04:38

Okay yeah, just break up with his ass. His mom is alive but he has no contact with her. She ran away to Brazil and left his grandmother to take care of him. His grandmother is deceased, however, he still talks to three of his aunts, two uncles and has several cousins. I feel so, so stupid.

Erika: 04:57

I wasn't willing to question or push boundaries or pay attention to the red flags. Lesson learned. I went over to Dustin's house to grab the rest of my belongings and guess who's there. And guess what the living room is full of? Moving boxes.

Erika: 05:13

Guess that didn't take long to get over. K is a new girlfriend now and according to him he's happier with her. His dumbass left me there while he went to pick her up from work. I bet he got a nice glittery surprise when he turned his ceiling fan on. Hope he has fun trying to get glitter out of his carpets and shoes and bathtub.

Erika: 05:34

I'm done and ready to move on. Thank you all for the support, you guys are amazing. Isn't that crazy?

Edgar: 05:39

I know, I mean, it's just too much lies and at that point this was like not even a real relationship they had.

Erika: 05:44

No, it was based off of lies. There was the top comment that says no, leave him. He prioritized a different girl over you so many times, lied to your face, let her walk all over you and overall didn't seem to care about you at all. Leave him for good, which thank God she did.

Edgar: 06:02

Yeah, yeah.

Erika: 06:03

That was a lot of lies in a three year relationship. How can you keep up

Edgar: 06:07

with lies for three years? Imagine? I like to think maybe Ophie just wasn't aware.

Erika: 06:15

Maybe she had, I don't know, have you heard this saying, had the rose gold, well, rose glasses on?

Edgar: 06:22

Yeah, rose tinted glasses, yeah.

Erika: 06:23

Yeah, I mean, she let it go too far. She stayed there too long. But I'm glad she's, you know, ready to go and move on. I believe that he is the asshole. Big time asshole for being a liar.

Edgar: 06:40

The next story is titled Am I the asshole for telling my wife not to come to my ex wife's funeral to support my daughter because my daughter doesn't want her there? My ex wife died a couple of days ago. We shared a daughter, 14, together. Our divorce was not on the best of terms. We were both at fault.

Edgar: 07:00

Nobody feuded though, but we weren't the best spouses to each other. For a long time we both tried to put our daughter first. But after I remarried things did change. My ex alienated our daughter against my wife. I did what I could to stop it and I made sure I tried to counteract what my ex was doing.

Edgar: 07:18

I did fight my ex in court over it. This was four years ago. My wife was pregnant at the time so it was stressful when we realized what was happening and my wife and daughter do not have a close or healthy relationship. My daughter shuts my wife out because of what her mom has said. She has at times been rude to my wife and I have stepped in to tell her that she cannot be like that.

Edgar: 07:40

I told her I can't make her like, love, or be close to my wife, but she must be respectful. The rudeness was never a big problem, but the rejection of a relationship has remained consistent. Now my ex wife is dead and my daughter is grieving. My daughter has stated clearly she does not want my wife or my son (3.5 years old) there. My wife wants to go to the funeral.

Edgar: 08:05

She said my daughter will always remember her not being there for her and keeping her brother away from supporting her if we listen. She said at the very least she must be there. That maybe our son is too young, but as a stepmom, if she doesn't show up and shows she loves her things, it would never get better. My daughter screamed at the top of her lungs yesterday because she heard my wife say she wants to come and support my daughter. My daughter stated it very aggressively, in a way of raw grief that my wife would not be a comfort because she hated her mom and nobody wants her there.

Edgar: 08:37

I told my wife not to come. I said I will be there and I know my daughter has mixed feelings about me being there but she ultimately wants me there. My wife expressed that she worried it was a big risk and my daughter would remember it as her not being supportive later. And I said potentially it could, but it could also show my daughter that she's willing to respect her boundaries. That's not trying to take her mom's place.

Edgar: 09:00

I told my wife it would be more difficult now because my daughter's mom is dead and it can be hard to see the flaws in people's actions when we lose them too soon. And I feel deep down that if she comes, it will show my daughter that she was against her more. My daughter sought the advice of the family therapist we have visited over the years and the therapist agreed with me. But my wife was upset. She told me she wanted my support and that she felt like I was encouraging her to not be a good stepmom.

Edgar: 09:29

Am I the asshole? No. Yeah, mean, yeah, you gotta respect her wishes of a daughter. She's like pretty emotional at the moment and hormonal probably.

Erika: 09:39

I mean, what would you do in this case? How would you try to make everybody happy?

Edgar: 09:46

You can't really make everybody happy because you always gotta give in those kinds of situations.

Erika: 09:51

So I would say at least he should try to talk to the daughter. However, if she has made up her mind, there's just no going back. I think he should respect the wishes which is what he's trying to do. So I would say he should speak to his wife for her to understand that it's not about her not being there for her, it's about his daughter's way of grieving. You can't try to force yourself in there because it's not gonna help.

Erika: 10:21

She'll reach out to her when the time comes, you know what mean?

Edgar: 10:25

Or if the time comes. I feel like it looks like they don't like each other at all and that kind of doesn't want to go away on its own. Yeah, I mean if she continues to

Erika: 10:35

show up and showing up even though she doesn't like her, eventually she'll see, you know, okay she was there for me. But at least I would think.

Edgar: 10:43

So if your stepdaughter tells you not to go to her real mom's funeral you would go?

Erika: 10:52

No I wouldn't. But I'm saying to be with her any other time, like anything that she needs and she needs support, be there for her. So eventually she'll see that you're not going anywhere and you're trying to be there for her as a parent. Because I mean you can't just expect love and trust and just being there for somebody and them reaching out to you is just automatic, you have to earn that.

Edgar: 11:16

So if

Erika: 11:16

she hasn't earned it you can't expect somebody to give it

Edgar: 11:20

to you. So I think she just needs time.

Erika: 11:23

Not the Asshole, your daughter is grieving and unfortunately your wife being there will not help her. She can be a good stepmom by respecting her stepdaughter in this time. Forcing her presence at such emotional charged time is just going to drive the wedge that exists further in. If your wife can't step back for a bit your daughter might be able to gradually build a respectful relationship with her. To add to this, I think the best way she can support her is to say, I won't be going but if you ever want to talk or need help at all, the door is open, I support you.

Erika: 11:54

That's it. Whether she takes her or not, that will be on her terms. Exactly. I mean, you can't force somebody to ask for your help. You need to give them time, especially at this time with no grieving and all that good stuff.

Edgar: 12:10

And you just gotta be tactical. And like saying, like just leaving the door open when you can't be there is always a good, like a gentle nudge that you are there even when you're not.

Erika: 12:23

Yeah, I agree. I think even just being a stepmom is difficult because it depends on the age also of the child. Like when, let's say you're a stepmom of a two year old,

Edgar: 12:34

three year old, five year old, it's much more simple. But I

Erika: 12:38

think when you have a 10 year old, 12 year old, 15 year old, it's definitely a little bit more difficult for you to relate or try to be in their life without them saying oh you're another stepmom or you're not really my mom type of thing.

Edgar: 12:51

You're not my mom! You guys deal with that teenage attitude?

Erika: 12:55

Well yeah, I mean but when you marry somebody and you decide to be with that person, that person has kids, you have to be able to deal with that and be willing to try to tell them that you love them regardless or at least that's what I would do, know, if I were ever to be in that position I would try to love them as my own child. But however, that's not always the case unfortunately.

Edgar: 13:22

And you can't, yeah. You just gotta be respectful about it.

Erika: 13:25

Exactly. So

Edgar: 13:28

So final verdict on that?

Erika: 13:30

I would say he's not the asshole at all. I don't think anybody is the asshole, you think?

Edgar: 13:34

Not really, maybe the daughter just because she's just I don't know why.

Erika: 13:38

She's grieving, I don't think she's that.

Edgar: 13:39

But before then she was just like an asshole to like the stepmom.

Erika: 13:42

Yeah, but I mean you never know, like you don't know what she did or she does behind her, the stepdad, I mean the dad.

Edgar: 13:50

Yeah.

Erika: 13:51

Like it's, I mean you can't just expectly think oh she hates me because of something, you know?

Edgar: 13:57

Yeah that's true.

Erika: 13:58

So yeah, so I would say that she's not, nobody's the asshole on this one. Okay, the next story is, Emma the Asshole for calling my husband a disgrace after he said my miscarriage ruined his birthday. I miscarried yesterday afternoon about 12PM. I've never had a miscarriage before, but this baby was so wished to come along that I'm sobbing right now. So I apologize in advance if it doesn't make sense.

Erika: 14:27

My husband turned 27 yesterday. I, 27 female, was pregnant with mine and my husband's twenty seventh second child. Yesterday I was eight weeks pregnant. The day before yesterday we saw a beautiful heartbeat flicking on the screen and today I'm devastated. I was playing with our two year old when I felt pressure in my lower abdomen.

Erika: 14:47

Not long later I noticed bleeding and I let my husband know immediately that I had discomfort in bleeding. Before long I had passed what I believe was the fetus. I messaged him I think I lost the baby. I wanted to keep him updated and I guess I was seeking some kind of emotional support. I asked if he could come home and he said of course if it's urgent.

Erika: 15:10

I said I think it is because the pain and bleeding is getting worse and I'm starting to feel lightheaded and our two year old is unattended in his playroom right now. We have no friends or family near and all I could call was him to get here quicker. I had to clean up myself, crawl down the stairs and take medicine, make my son his lunch, and then put him down for a nap. At this point my husband still isn't home. He was working approximately thirty minutes away until closer to sixty minutes to get back.

Erika: 15:41

Hours later when I asked it was because he stopped at Tesco to pick up some beers.

Edgar: 15:46

I

Erika: 15:48

end up very poorly losing lots of blood, lightheaded, vomiting, etc. He had to take me to the ER. By the time I was discharged it was almost 8PM. Last week I had said I'll take him to his favorite dinner for his birthday, which he reminded me when we were almost home. I said I wasn't feeling up to it and that whatever takeaway he wanted it's on me.

Erika: 16:11

He said, For F's sake under his breath and then he murders something along the lines, This BS has ruined my birthday. He didn't stop to get any takeaway, he just drove straight home. He put our son to bed and I went to bed and I'm not sure what he did after. I didn't see him in the morning as he already left for work. He's not messaged me all day and he got home a few hours ago and it's now 08:40PM and he's been giving me the silent treatment.

Erika: 16:38

I tried to speak to him about an hour or so ago and he ignored me. I called him a disgrace. He slammed the bedroom door and locked me out of the bedroom. His mom has since messaged me and said, I need to be patient as he's also had a loss. He didn't ask how I was, well she didn't ask how I was or anything.

Erika: 16:59

He's obviously speaking to his mom but why isn't he opening up and speaking to me? She said I was harsh. I'm feeling utterly emotionally neglected right now. My body has been through emotional and physical hell. I understand my miscarriage came to un I understand my miscarriage came inconvenient time for him as it was his birthday and all.

Erika: 17:22

I'm not sure if the hormones make you feel crazy, but is it nuts to contemplate divorce? Am I the asshole for calling him a disgrace?

Edgar: 17:32

I think that's a pretty crazy story. She just lost a baby and then all you can think about is if you didn't get to go to my birthday dinner.

Erika: 17:39

I'm so in shock right now. Like I'm like lost of words here. Yeah. I the fact that I believe this is a common behavior yeah so I feel like she has to question if this is something that you know that she's overreacting. It has made her feel like her feelings are not valid throughout the marriage.

Erika: 18:08

That right now she's questioning, should I have tried harder? Is it my fault? Is he not a disgrace? Like did I offend him? Was I too Like it's insane that right now he's trying she's trying to like basically not defend him but she thinks that she's in the wrong in all this situation.

Edgar: 18:31

Yeah the quiet part is like this is probably like a common behavior for OP's husband only now that this is the most extreme example or the extreme thing that is happening, she's realizing it.

Erika: 18:42

Oh my gosh.

Edgar: 18:44

I also feel like it's crazy, like even the mother is kind of like, I feel like the mother probably enabled this behavior for OP's husband.

Erika: 18:50

First of all, she shouldn't be telling her you're too harsh or anything. First of all, you're not in their relationship. You gotta see your way out. And if he has time to speak with her why can't he be a man, an adult and speak to her? Instead of speaking to his mom.

Erika: 19:11

Oh my gosh, I'm, you know, I feel so bad for OP because this whole losing a baby eight weeks you hear a heartbeat and you just you see the baby like she saw the baby and it's that's just so traumatic that's something that literally just doesn't, you you don't forget about just a day after, a week later, a month later. It's very traumatic in someone's life. And I think she needs that support and she doesn't have anybody near her or family. I think it's really sad at this point. And I think she just needs to honestly get divorced.

Erika: 19:48

And OP, you're not nuts for contemplating divorce. You agree? So the top comment is: You are still at risk for infection at this juncture. It's still dangerous for you. Monitor your bleeding and temperature.

Erika: 20:03

Your marriage is sober. How long do you stay with him is up to you. But this means neither your husband nor the father material. He cares more about what he wants than your child and yourself. It took a crisis like this to show you who he really is and not that asshole.

Erika: 20:20

I'm so sorry you're going through all of this. Yeah he's just so egocentric she needs to get rid

Edgar: 20:26

of him. So the garbage he goes and let somebody else pick up that That's

Erika: 20:33

so frustrating.

Edgar: 20:35

Kind of right?

Erika: 20:37

No, not the asshole girl. Divorce him and get rid of him.

Edgar: 20:40

The next story is titled My now ex husband didn't want to clean his dirty laundry off the floor. My revenge is still haunting him to this day. That sounds gross. But yeah, me, 26 female, and my now ex boyfriend, 25 male, moved in together to a different country about four years ago. He was already living there for about three years and for me it was a time to join him.

Edgar: 21:04

Let me tell you this was a huge deal and I am extremely stressful over the situation. I had never been living outside my homeland or even outside my family house before. Suddenly I was away from my close friends. I had to improve my language 100% and I couldn't find a job for the first six months. And the food was awful.

Edgar: 21:26

I didn't even know how to get myself a doctor's appointment and it was corona time. On top of that we had a very long time trying to get along with my partner as it's pretty normal for all new roommates to establish a few roles and some common ground, but in our case it felt like this process didn't really end up until the day we broke up. One day he left his dirty underpants on the floor literally next to the washing machine. Mind you that our washing machine was located in the kitchen so good for us cooking and eating next to it. I was frustrated because come on really?

Edgar: 21:59

It's literally right there. I asked him to clean it up and he said, Yep, I'll do it. The same conversation was happening almost every day for about two weeks. I was relentless. I know it was just one piece of clothing but it wasn't mine and I'm not a person who made to pick up after him.

Edgar: 22:17

Every time it was the same story I would remind him kindly he would say he'll do it later and then go play video games with his friends and forget. For two whole weeks. So I came up with an idea. I didn't know his friends mostly, but I was in touch with a few of them. And I know that it was a typical male environment.

Edgar: 22:36

They love to make fun of each other and they generally don't want to hang out with you if you're easily offended. I messaged one of her friends if he could please tell my boyfriend to clean his dirty pants off the kitchen floor. You guess what happened next. The guys had a huge laugh at him. He was livid but cleaned up after himself and never left any dirty clothes on the floor ever again.

Edgar: 22:56

We broke up two years later, but for the entire time they would still occasionally make fun of him. He tells them he needs to go because I came back from work, but did you remember to take your panties off from the floor? He says to them, I have a bad mood today. Maybe you didn't clean your panties off the floor. And so on and so forth.

Edgar: 23:19

I bet they still do the same thing to him to this very day. So, I mean, this happened two years ago, so I feel like this probably wasn't the cause of his, of their breakup. I think he just wants to spread the story to even more people.

Erika: 23:35

Yeah. I think, mean, come on. The kitchen floor, that's just gross. I mean, the bedroom, I get it, okay?

Edgar: 23:46

Was it cooking with no underwear on? I feel like that's dangerous.

Erika: 23:51

I can't even imagine like coming into the house and seeing underwear or pants or something on the kitchen floor. I think I would be flipping out.

Edgar: 24:01

But yeah, I mean

Erika: 24:05

sometimes it doesn't work out, but I don't think that's the reason for, like you mentioned, for the breakup.

Edgar: 24:10

Just probably something he was remembering while thinking about the Hope relationship.

Erika: 24:14

Yeah. So the top comment is, I like how this turned out. They'll never let up. Now they can say, you left because of his dirty laundry. It makes him sound pathetic.

Erika: 24:27

Okay, so the next story is, I faked liking sparkling water for three years and now I'm trapped. I'm 30 now, but this started when I was around 27. During a phase where I was really trying hard to be one of those put together adults who meal prep, drink sparkling water, and have plans that aren't just dying slowly in the corner. So I bought a 12 pack of LaCrosse because, you know, that's what the cool healthy people were drinking. First sip, it tasted like someone whispered the word fruit into a cup of TB stack.

Erika: 25:04

That was good. Absolutely disgusting. I had already post- Disgusting. Whatever, I don't I mean actually it wasn't bad. But as you know it's an acquired taste, you get used to it.

Erika: 25:18

Anyways, but I had already posted on Instagram story with the caption, new addiction lol. And that was the beginning of my downfall. Friends started bringing LaCrosse over when they visited, Co workers stocked it in the office fridge because I liked it. My girlfriend, now fiance, thought it was cute how into sparkling water I was. So she bought me a Soda Stream for Christmas.

Edgar: 25:46

Grim. Imagine having like so little personality that drinking bubbly is a personality of a froth.

Erika: 25:56

That is hilarious. Now I'm into deep. I've become the guy who nods softly while drinking what essentially is spicy sadness. Have flavors in my fridge with names like Pample Mousse and Lemoncello and I pretend like I can tell the difference. I can't.

Erika: 26:16

It all tastes like carbonated regret.

Edgar: 26:18

I wouldn't be this guy's friend.

Erika: 26:22

Sometimes I would, this is funny.

Edgar: 26:24

Sometimes I- I love bubbly. I like sparkling water.

Erika: 26:28

It doesn't mean because somebody doesn't like it and you can't be friends with him.

Edgar: 26:31

There's too many difficulties in having a friendship. We don't need to have any

Erika: 26:35

differences. Whatever, I think he's super funny. Sometimes I just want a normal drink. But if I open a Gatorade someone would say, woah, Nola Croft today? And I can't with this story.

Erika: 26:54

And I was just fake laugh like, gotta switch it up. Meanwhile my soul is quietly screaming. Anyway, if you're younger reading this, never lie about your beverages, that stuff will haunt you. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. That is so funny.

Erika: 27:15

I mean, I grew to like bubbly and anything sparkly. I hate polar polar spark, whatever.

Edgar: 27:23

I know what you're talking about, but yeah, I don't I think that's the only one I don't like just because the fizz goes No, I feel like the fizz goes way too fast. No. It's not strong enough for me.

Erika: 27:32

No dude, it's too strong for me. I'm like choking there. I

Edgar: 27:37

liked it ever since I was little.

Erika: 27:38

Really? No, I never liked, only carbonated drinks I would drink would be soda when I was younger. But now I don't drink soda and now I just drink bubbly because you know, obviously it's healthier. So the top comment is tell everyone you're going carbonation free. Easy solution.

Erika: 28:02

People taste change over time. You could also pretend they changed something in the formula and it's longer pleasing to your taste buds.

Edgar: 28:09

Yeah, I think it's a simple fix. You can also just say I just don't like it anymore. Like if you eat too much of anything you usually get tired of it.

Erika: 28:19

Yeah, definitely. And then everybody's taste buds always change over time too.

Edgar: 28:24

Nevermind. I've been eating the same thing for the past fifteen-twenty years.

Erika: 28:31

Okay. That's for every day? Well, mean, yeah, I can say. Because I feel like Peruvian food and Ecuadorian food is basically the same.

Edgar: 28:39

We're not even

Erika: 28:39

that far We have similarities, yeah. We're like right next to each other. So we can't really say, Oh, you tried my food, but then again it's not that different. So yeah, mean I guess you got lucky. That's all the stories we have today.

Erika: 28:53

Thank you for tuning in to this week's episode. Check out our website www.yappings.com and join our mail list for updates. If you love our podcast and want to support us, subscribe and share to your friends and family, we would appreciate it so much.

Edgar: 29:10

Also we have a Facebook group called AITA Relationship and Family Drama, linked in the description. Join me so you can share Am I The Asshole posts you like or share your own stories for us all to judge. We may even read a few posts in one of our episodes if you're lucky.

Erika: 29:26

Thank you, bye!