Episode 20
· 35:39
Yapping!
Erika:Hello. This is Erika.
Edgar:And Edgar.
Erika:And we are the Yapping Snowsers. We entertain you with the app worthy stories we find around the web. And today's theme is called Hidden Agendas. And I just wanted to let you know we both are kinda sick today, our voice is gonna sound a little bit different. Bear with us.
Edgar:The first story is titled, Am I the Asshole for Letting My Mother-in-law Call Me the Wrong Name for a Decade? My mother-in-law and I do not get along. She, on multiple occasions, has given me a list of women she wished my husband would have married instead of me. She told me I needed weight loss surgery when I was pregnant. I was five pounds over my BMI, and she had kinkles.
Edgar:Also, when I was pregnant, she told mutual friends she had to stay with me so I didn't screw up the baby. All fun stories for another time. I don't care to have a relationship with her, so I mostly ignore her and my husband and I make fun of her later. Not entirely healthy, but it's how we cope. When my hubby and I were dating we started getting serious so we did the whole meet the parents thing.
Edgar:I have a very common 80s girl name, not hard to pronounce and super easy. My husband introduced me to his parents and everything was fine. A little later, mother-in-law calls me by the wrong name. I politely correct her. It's worth noting here my my it's worth noting here my mother-in-law hates to be corrected or told she is wrong about anything.
Edgar:She will literally scream and start rage crying if you correct her on something and insist she is right. This is exactly what happened. She flies into her rage and screams at me that she knows my name. I'm shocked, wide eyed, mouth hanging open like a trout, and everyone else is just acting like nothing is happening since apparently this is a common occurrence. Years go by.
Edgar:She continues to call me the wrong name. Everyone else calls me by the correct name. When my husband is talking to her and uses my name, she says, who's that? To which my husband replies, my wife. This Thanksgiving, the in laws come for the holidays.
Edgar:My five year old is learning his safety info for school. His address, phone number, parent's name, etcetera. I'm quizzing my son so we can get a reward for learning the info. Mother-in-law is looking behind us. We get to what's mom's name and mother-in-law jumps in before my son can answer and says the wrong name like she's beating him at a TV trivia show.
Edgar:My son looks at me wide eyed and obviously confused, partly from the shock of his kindergarten assignment turning into a fast paced game of Jeopardy and partly because he knows that that's not my name. I have to say something at this point so I ignore mother-in-law completely and tell my son, that's not mom's name. What is it? My son answers with the correct name. Mother-in-law spends the next couple minutes insisting she's right.
Edgar:My husband and I tell her she's not. Instead of exploding, she unexpectedly sulks. Later, we go over to my parents' house. As I'm setting the table, I see my mother-in-law cornering my mother in the kitchen, grilling her about my name. Apparently, mother-in-law was convinced we were lying to her, so she needed to verify with my mom.
Edgar:She insists, no one told her my real name. I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy Thanksgiving a little more this year knowing that mother-in-law thought we were running a ten year campaign to embarrass her. My husband and I have had a lot of laughs about this for the past few months. But recently, I told the story to a friend who said I was an asshole for letting her call me the wrong name for a decade, then laughing at her behind her back about it. Girl, please.
Edgar:And so I guess my question is, am I the asshole?
Erika:No.
Edgar:And no. It's like nothing assholish on the OP's enemies about not correcting her mother.
Erika:That's funny.
Edgar:The mother-in-law, like, obviously she didn't like her. And obviously, feel like the first time he she named called her the wrong name, I think it was like on purpose, but I feel like over time
Erika:She forgot.
Edgar:She forgot like, oh, yeah, actually don't like you and this is like a fake name I made for you. Yeah.
Erika:I don't know why she would think that a ten year thing to make her foolish would be something that anybody had effort to do. Like
Edgar:Some people would think they're that important, I guess.
Erika:I guess. But I mean, seriously, she tried to correct her and she didn't take it well. Yeah. So it's not her fault. She would be an asshole if she didn't correct her and just let her go and continue.
Erika:Because at least she would've, know, said I I tried to tell her the the my real name, you know?
Edgar:Mhmm.
Erika:So yeah. I don't no. Not at all. She had nothing to do Yeah. With that.
Edgar:If anything, the friend is the asshole for trying to imply that OP is the asshole for anything. Like, don't think anyone here in this story was that asshole ish. Maybe the mom a little bit.
Erika:The mother-in-law definitely is. Yeah. Yes.
Edgar:But that
Erika:She would throw tantrums because somebody corrected her with anything.
Edgar:Oh, yeah. I mean, besides that, I think she's she's just very, like, immature. She should be
Erika:an adult. Yes.
Edgar:Yeah. Very immature. I feel like she like, messing with the OP's name just backfired on her tremendously, like, ten years later.
Erika:Yeah. I mean, that's I mean, so the fact that a five year old corrected her
Edgar:Mhmm.
Erika:Was funny. Yeah. Later like that. The top comment is my mother-in-law insisted that my name was x. I told her it was not.
Erika:Her son told her it was not. She threw a temper tantrum. We moved on. For the next ten years, she called me by the wrong name. She ignored everyone calling me by the right name.
Erika:After ten years, she was confronted with the truth. She is embarrassed that she ignored everyone for ten years. My mother-in-law is the asshole here, there and everywhere. So, yeah. Basically, you just seeded a whole little
Edgar:Like summarized it?
Erika:Yeah. They summarized it. But yeah, mean like if everybody else was calling her the other name, did she think that she was just the right person? Like the right one only? Like, I don't know.
Edgar:Alright. Yeah, so final verdict?
Erika:No, she's not the asshole but the mother-in-law is.
Edgar:Yeah, I say yeah. Ophie's definitely not the asshole.
Erika:Yeah, next story is my mother admitted something to me that really bothered me. When I was in high school, I applied to a bunch of colleges. This was back in 02/2007 when colleges sent acceptance letters through the mail. My relationship with my family has always been problematic as they both preferred my older brother. Mainly because he wanted to be a doctor while I wanted to write and direct movies.
Erika:My older brother never had the grades of attitude to be anything, let alone a doctor. He always stood tantrums when things didn't go his way and he built a reputation in school of being a crybaby mama's boy. Imagine that. I never got accepted anywhere and ended up getting thrown out by my dad who called me an idiot. I spent a year sleeping on a friend's couch before I got a stable job in line painting.
Erika:I had to break up with my high school sweetheart as well as the stress got to me and she got into college and we grew apart. Now it's been eighteen years since all of that and I own a line painting company and asphalt repair company. It wasn't easy and I did get her a bunch of times on the job. So now I have a shoulder issues and lower back issues. My mother reached out to me recently and we met up to talk.
Erika:My dad was there too. I haven't seen them in years. She revealed that my brother still lives at home and flunked out of college and refuses to get a job. He spends all day sleeping. He also got in trouble in the past for assaulting his barber.
Erika:My brother is bald by the way. Crazy. She then tells me that I actually had gotten accepted into a bunch of different colleges and shows me a stack of old male back from 02/2007. It turns out that both she and my brother were intercepting the acceptance letters from the mailbox because she didn't want me to succeed at something before my brother did. They both said they were sorry for everything and want to start over with me.
Erika:I've forgotten the terrible way they made me feel in the past and now I'm not entirely sure what to do. This one's like an advice one. What do you think? What what advice would you give OP?
Edgar:I would just keep the parents at arm's length, but, like, never be, like, too close just because, like, it all worked out in the end for OP. Like, he has, like, his company. He has, like, money. He has his own success. But I can see why he'd be so upset because that time of his life where, like, college and, like, his sweetheart from high school or, like, just everything at that time, everything seemed more important than it was now.
Edgar:But like through all that struggle, he like was able to make a name for himself. But yeah, sitting it's like messed up in the first place to like manipulate the situation to make it seem like his brother was more successful than OP.
Erika:Honestly, I would just break off Complete Contact. What they did to OP was so messed up. They literally destroyed the future of OP because he could have gone to college could have done something else. Maybe what he wanted to do wasn't obviously it wasn't line or asphalt repair company it was to be a right and a director. So he had to give up on his dream give up on his sweetheart child sweetheart because he didn't go to college and the fact that they didn't want OP to succeed because the brother wasn't you know succeeding at that time was insane to me.
Erika:They chose the favoritism and made the other brother to suffer. So the fact that he turned out okay I don't think so.
Edgar:I think I actually think he turned out okay because the alternative was he would go into college for four years and be in on the average of $40,000 in debt. And go to some profession that honestly wouldn't have paid as well as He's getting paid right now. So I think indirectly the parents kind of helped him even though they did not mean to help him.
Erika:I don't know but he didn't get to do what he wanted and then he has hurt his back and He in his shoulder on the job, so he has issues with that So I don't know. I still don't think They still didn't give him a chance. You don't know what he what could have happened when he was in college. He just took away his his dream and whatever he wanted to do, directed him to a different path. So no.
Erika:I think the fact that it was a ridiculous reason why they even removed or did not allow OP to receive those letters is just unbelievable. This is just it's for me. It's not it's unexcusable. I would just right there and there just walk out and be like, yeah. Have a good life and just leave.
Erika:I don't think forgiving them will give me any good if they're able to do that at that time. But what what can they do for me now? So I don't need them in my life. They weren't there in my life for years. What's the point of keeping them now?
Erika:Especially after you finding out how terrible they treated you when you were younger. Let me remind you that her father kicked her out of the house saying that or he or she whatever OP out of the house saying that they were that he was what stupid and kicked him out even though the mother and the brother knew or maybe the father didn't know that she did get accepted. OP got kicked out all of that and had to sleep in somebody else's couch and try and really you know struggle throughout his life and it's okay I don't think so no I'm glad he you know at least whatever he wants to do he wants to forgive them good for him but I personally I would just right there cut ties. The top comment is start over before you even had a chance to process the betrayal. Highly dysfunctional family dynamics were in play here, meaning generational trauma.
Erika:You don't really need to have them in your life when they treat you so terribly. I agree with that comment. Yeah, I mean they weren't her parents, the OP's parents at all. No child should be treated that way.
Edgar:What's the final verdict on that?
Erika:I would say personally I would just stay away from them cut ties. I don't think you need people like that in your life. But obviously everybody has their own choice and he thinks he could keep them around and try to have a relationship then good for him. Yeah
Edgar:And then I say OP himself is a knee asshole, but OP's parents is. And my advice to him is, like, if you want them around, because they obviously came back because they have a deep regret, but just give them an arm's length because, like, even though they because they they weren't there for him when he needed them.
Erika:I think the only reason they have some regret is because the brother did nothing in his life. And the one that he they favored literally is a failure.
Edgar:Mhmm. The next story is titled, Am I overreacting for breaking off my engagement because my fiance was catfishing other men pretending to be me. Me and my fiance have been together for four years. We have been living together for two. We got engaged last year and I was so excited to spend the rest of my life with him.
Edgar:I even booked a wedding venue before he even proposed. The wedding venue, photographer, videographer, and all other expenses were put on my credit cards. Bro. Earlier this year, I came home to find my boyfriend's laptop open. My fiance has a MacBook and a text message popped up and I thought, what the heck, why not look?
Edgar:When I opened the messages, it was someone sounding as if they were in a romantic relationship with my fiance. After going through the message threads, I realized that it was a man that he was talking to. I continued to scroll through the old messages and came across pieces of conversation that sounded as if my fiance was posing as a woman. After continuing to scroll, I came across pictures of myself that I shared with my partner. Yes, these were intimate photos of myself.
Edgar:I came to the conclusion that my fiance was catfishing other men posing as me and using my nude photos. After going through more messages I discovered that he was conversing with multiple men posing to be me. I never found any messages of him soliciting them for anything so I'm unsure why he was doing this. I immediately broke off the engagement. Two of my friends are telling me that maybe I overreacted and just sit down and try to figure out why he did this to me.
Edgar:Especially because I am struggling to get some of my money back from the wedding deposit. I have still not told my parents why I broke off the engagement because it would be very weird to tell my parents that my photos are in strangers phones now. Am I overacting for breaking off my engagement from my fiance because he was catfishing men opposing to be me? And no, don't think he's overacting.
Erika:Absolutely not.
Edgar:Yeah. I was a little bit confused when I was reading it, but yeah. Think yeah. It's like messed up. Like weird.
Edgar:Like, why? There's nothing you can possibly get from that.
Erika:The only thing that came up with was like maybe he's trying to send pictures so he could be like getting money from the suitors. But she said she didn't find anything.
Edgar:Yeah, it's definitely weird. And I'm pretty sure it's illegal He's sharing someone else's photos, like, else's nude photos without their permission.
Erika:It's so messed up. Mhmm. Imagine. Like, I can't even I don't even know how I would feel. It's completely shock.
Erika:Like
Edgar:I'd be so weirded out, but yeah. I don't think she's overreacting. But I think it's like a stupid decision on her part that puts so much like money for like a future wedding on like credit cards because like that's gonna like and especially like in credit cards. Like it's just it's like a very terrible place to be at the moment. Know.
Edgar:Financially she's like screwed for like at least years. Yeah, years and years.
Erika:Yeah, I just feel bad. I feel like they I mean I guess she really trusted her fiance in thinking that, you know, they're gonna get married and build a life together. So I guess where she was coming from, maybe she shouldn't have used her credit cards, but yeah, she's really got screwed over. And the fact that the friends are saying that she's overreacting, it's ridiculous. Yeah.
Erika:You need new friends, OP.
Edgar:Yeah. Those are not good friends to have. No. Like anyone like, I feel like they just have no empathy because if put yourself in that situation, I'd be just as weirded out.
Erika:Yeah. Like, I don't even know how it would feel. I really would like I would feel creeped out too.
Edgar:Yeah, because yeah, there's just like so much wrong with that.
Erika:You would never expect your significant other to do that, you know what mean? Share your nudes and then pretend that to be To be you. I, oh, that's just gross. The top comment is Nevermind the catfishing. He was sending your nudes to other people.
Erika:You need to get better friends. I'm sorry this happened to you.
Edgar:Yeah, I agree.
Erika:Yeah, she needs better friends and she needs to get out of that. There's just no explanation that is worthy to give him a chance. You know what mean? Like this is the this is it. No matter what he tries to explain.
Edgar:Yeah. He was a weird guy.
Erika:Yeah. It's just there's just no excuse. There's no reason that would be valid for me.
Edgar:He can't control himself, bro. Yeah.
Erika:So OP, get rid of him.
Edgar:Mhmm. Agreed.
Erika:That's the final verdict for me. Okay. Next story is I have lied about my entire life to everyone I know. I have lied about every single aspect of my life to everyone I know. My closest friends, my boyfriend of three years, my family.
Erika:No one knows the real me. A version of myself they know is completely fabricated. I told my friends I go to Brown University, but the truth is I go to a community college because my dad blew all my college funds on alcohol and gambling. I couldn't afford to go anywhere else, but I was too ashamed to admit that. So I built this lie about being at a prestigious school pretending I have this bright successful future ahead of me.
Erika:My life is empty and miserable. I'm a functioning alcoholic and drink alone whenever I'm not with my boyfriend or friends. I cannot drink around them because I lose control and drink too much. I drink until all the alcohol is gone or I block out. I have no off switch.
Erika:I've almost died from alcohol poisoning several times but no one except my family knows. My friends have no idea and I've never told my boyfriend even though we've been together for three years. I've been arrested multiple times because of my drinking and been in a severe accident. I wrecked my car, walked away injured, and I always lied my way out. When I crashed my car, I told my friends a ridiculous story about a reckless driver.
Erika:I lie about my family too. I tell my friends my dad is the vice president of a successful company, which was true years ago before he got fired because of his alcoholism. Now he's barely hanging on, drinking himself to death, but no one knows. My parents have been split up for years, but if you ask my friends, they would tell you I come from my happy successful family. I even lie about my brother.
Erika:I tell my friends we're close and I make up stories about things we've done together. But in reality, my brother hates me. He has caught all contact with me. I don't even know what's going on in his life anymore but I still pretend like I do. It's easier than admit it why he wants nothing to do with me.
Erika:On top of all of this my mental health is a mess. I have bipolar disorder, struggled with anorexia and have other mental issues, but I hide it all. No one knows. I've kept everything hidden from my friends and my boyfriend. I lie about even the smallest, most meaningless things.
Erika:If I spill something on my shirt, I say somebody bumped into me. If I wake up at 2PM, I'll tell everyone I was up early in the gym. I fabricate fake social events, fake friendships and fake accomplishments to go to extreme lengths to keep my lies consistent. I don't know how to stop. I've lied for so long, I don't even know who I am without it.
Erika:If anyone found out the truth I would lose everything. So what do you think about the story? It's not an Emma the Asshole story it's just somebody confessing basically.
Edgar:Yeah I guess she's just kind of coping with everything but she's like living a lie or at least telling everyone that she's living a lie at the moment.
Erika:I think it's really sad. Honestly, the fact that she feels like she needs to lie to everybody because she doesn't feel like she's accomplished anything and that she's a failure. It just saddens me. She has a dysfunctional family and she didn't have anybody to run to or have anybody to trust so she thinks lying is the only way to keep this facade going. But, you know, I think at some point she needs to come clean because the alcoholism and all the blackouts and the accidents and the lying is just not going to go anywhere good.
Erika:It's not going to end good for
Edgar:her. Think she's just saying all this because this is like the life she wants to have. Like she wished that she had like a happy family with like a dad she could be proud of. She wished she had her own like successes by going to like a prestigious university. Like she was having like an over a happy life.
Edgar:It's just her trying to convince not only everyone else but herself that she's living that life.
Erika:Yeah, I think she just likes what she wish she had and it's just really sad really. I think for the people that we have family that we are blessed with and siblings that you know love us whatever it's something that not many people always have. But I think if somebody was to lie with so many aspects of their life I feel like the people around them would notice but maybe they're just waiting for her to come clean.
Edgar:Probably yeah they probably So
Erika:the top comment is want to know a secret? They probably kinda already know you're lying. They have probably seen through the stories, heard the inconsistencies, and have talked about this issue behind your back. They've seen the effect and suspicion of drinking are there too. I don't know if this helps but you're not that good at it as you think.
Erika:So you can start by telling little truths rather than the little lies and move up to the big ones or you can wait, get caught and lose it all.
Edgar:Yeah, mean it's a a good strategy. Just like because she needs to, like, come back, and she has people who are around her, like, currently. Like, they maybe they don't know everything, but I can imagine they are suspicious about her life. And since they are ready, they probably would be a little bit more open to helping her out. Yeah.
Edgar:But I think it'll be a hard kinda, like, transition because then she has to, like, come to terms of how life actually is. And I imagine her boyfriend won't be too happy if she finds out that she was lying for like three years.
Erika:I mean, I'm sure he knows. I'm sure he knows certain things.
Edgar:Mhmm. Like, has he not met the parents yet? I don't know. Not.
Erika:Yeah, I think at this point she just should just start with the little lies like oh you know like she's meeting her brother or something you say yeah actually my brother and I are really not that close you know. Something little to help her you know just start off and you know let the snow fall and may create you know a effect. So I honestly think she should come clean before she loses it all like the common sense.
Edgar:So any final advice for her?
Erika:I would say just come clean girl. I'm sure they'll understand for the people that really care about you and just want the best for you. So
Edgar:the next story is titled I found out that my coworker smells my t shirt everyday. Hey everyone, I'm a guy, 18 years old. This is a 17 year old girl at my work. She's really nice and we have a lot in common. Lately we've been talking more and ending up on the same shifts together.
Edgar:Today was one of those days. Everything was going as usual. We joked around a lot and had fun. But today, the locker room door lock broke. I walk in, not expecting anyone to be there, and saw her standing there, holding my t shirt.
Edgar:She was smelling it. I opened the door pretty fast, so she didn't have time to react. I just froze, completely shocked, not knowing what to say. And she quickly threw the t shirt back in my locker and walked out without saying a word. For the rest of our shit, we barely talked.
Edgar:I used to like her, but now I have no idea what to think. I need advice. Why would she do that? I wonder why. What does this mean?
Erika:Okay. So what do you think?
Edgar:Mummy?
Erika:Yeah, why do think that she is smelling the t shirt?
Edgar:Obviously, she dropped some food earlier and she just smelling it again because it was so good.
Erika:Yeah, no.
Edgar:No, I think yeah, she likes him. It's very obvious. I think it's, like, weird, but I mean, people do pretty crazy stuff when they like someone else. So obviously not the weirdest thing, but it's pretty up there. Yeah.
Edgar:I can understand why he would be stressed out about it, but I think he's 18. She's 17. Yeah. I mean
Erika:yeah. It's They're pretty young.
Edgar:They're pretty young.
Erika:I honestly wouldn't know what to think. I I mean, I would be kind a little bit flattered because, know, maybe I smell good. But then I'll be like, okay. What do you
Edgar:That's like if you wanna have like a like a obsessed person with you. Like Some people are into that.
Erika:Well, I don't know. I mean, smelling somebody's t shirt, like, and then the lock broke apparently. What if she broke the lock? Do you know that? So, I don't know, it's a little bit
Edgar:She's pharaoh for him.
Erika:That's crazy. So the top comment is the biggest line between something being sexy or creepy depends on how into the other person is. Exactly what you said so yeah. Let's see. But there is an edit which you can go ahead and read.
Edgar:Mhmm. Yeah. Agree with that too because if you're attractive and you do that, like, people say, oh, okay. So you're just very into me. But if it's not attractive, people are gonna say, oh, that's like like, creepy.
Edgar:Like, imagine, like, the homeless guy that lives behind the Paley dollar sniffing your your clothes. Like, I I called the cops at that point. But if it's, like, like, we'll still be crushed, like Sabrina Carpenter or something like that. I'd be like, oh, okay. She likes me that much.
Erika:Yeah. I guess it also depends on attractiveness of the person. And then also the age gap. Like, if it was like an old man and he was 17 or like an old woman, know, something like that would be weird.
Edgar:Mhmm. That's true. But I mean, there's some attractive old people, I guess.
Erika:You're into it, I guess. Like something, it depends on the preference of the person.
Edgar:Attractiveness. So there's an edit. The edit says, Okay guys, I did not expect the story to blow up like this. First of all, thank you all for your responses and for taking the time to weigh in. I thought I'd get like one or two replies and move on, but I need to come clean.
Edgar:I can't lie to so many kind hearted people. The truth is, I'm the girl in the story. So OP is the girl.
Erika:For
Edgar:clarifications. Everything I've heard is true, but I described it from his perspective to see how people would react and how he might perceive the whole thing. Basically, I wanted to get an idea of what he would think of me. I was going to just leave it at that, but I have some good news. I did exactly what you guys suggested, just in reverse.
Edgar:I texted him and asked if he could talk. He was busy and couldn't meet up, so we ended up discussing it over chat. I apologized like a million times and tried to explain myself, but he said it was all good, That he actually found it more funny than creepy. See? So he she's probably attractive.
Edgar:And we haven't really talked much since, but at least we're still on good terms. Oh, and in three hours, I have another shift with him. Stay tuned for updates. And then there's one final update. Okay, guys.
Edgar:The ending is probably a bit more boring than you expected. I literally just changed after my shift, and now I'm waiting for him so we can walk home together. We live in the same general direction. We barely talked all day and when we did it was just normal, no awkwardness or anything. But here's the thing, he could've gone home earlier, yet he stayed to help me with orders and even stuck around for a bit, just waiting for me, like we used to do before all of this.
Edgar:I feel like if he were actually creeped up on me, he would've just left early when he had the chance. I don't know, I don't want to get my hopes up after everything that happened. I think in his eyes, I'm still just his nice coworker. Just a bit weirder now. Looks like that's the end of the story.
Edgar:So I think he is attracted to her as well, but it's like kinda like
Erika:He's still kinda debating, I guess, how
Edgar:he More like he's trying to like see like the most
Erika:How crazy she is.
Edgar:Yeah. But also how to transition from just being co workers to being like in a relationship because like it's had like, he's definitely not, like, repulsed enough to, like, wanna quit or, like, leave at the earliest convenience. So I think he's, like especially with him lingering, he's trying to figure out, like, how to make a move, I guess.
Erika:Yeah. So I think she should be okay.
Edgar:Mhmm. Like, probably all his bros were like, yeah, she's definitely into you guys.
Erika:Well, obviously, if she's not your t shirt. But see, like, she completely did a little twist in there and the update.
Edgar:Mhmm.
Erika:Yeah. I think she should just let, you know, if something happens happens so I don't think he's really he's not attracted to her either.
Edgar:OP you're into clear because you're attractive.
Erika:Alright so last story is Emma the Asshole for leaving my boyfriend after finding a woman in our bed.
Edgar:Bro.
Erika:So I26female is going on a trip to London with my sister today. I've been staying with her since yesterday because she lives close to the airport. I realized I forgot my passport at my apartment where my boyfriend, 27 male, and I live together. And I had time to go back and get it, so I did. I texted him this morning to let him know I was coming back to get my passport, but he didn't respond.
Erika:When I got there he looked really antsy and suspicious. I went into our bedroom and found a woman I don't recognize lying in our bed fully clothed. I just went on autopilot, grabbed my passport, told him we were over and left. Now my boyfriend's blowing up my phone saying that the woman is his long time friend and that she's a lesbian who just needed a place to crash for the night. I don't believe him because he never mentioned anything about her staying over while I was gone and the whole situation feels off.
Erika:He's saying I'm making a huge mistake and that he's telling the truth, but honestly, I'm just really hurt and confused. He's begging for me to hear him out and is apologizing but this whole situation is not right. So am I the asshole for leaving him? Should I believe his explanation or is it my gut telling me the truth? We were just signed a lease for two months ago and I'm literally leaving the country today.
Erika:So it's a horrible and stressful situation. What do think, she's an asshole?
Edgar:Yeah she isn't the asshole in this situation because it's like a big surprise to see like an unfamiliar person in your house like especially if it's like the opposite gender of your partner. I think there's a chance that he's telling the truth and that he didn't want to like tell OP like, oh my lesbian friend's coming over, don't worry, because like it's like weird.
Erika:I really don't believe him. I think maybe the 1% chance of he's telling the truth but really I think she should follow her gut and if she feels that he's lying then she should not give him a chance But I still find it weird that he didn't want to say anything because it was just last minute no. I think as soon as that would have happened she should have said something. And he just decided to just go behind her back. Nah, I think he's lying and good thing that she forgot her passport so she can see that there's a woman in his bed.
Erika:And plus, okay, let's say she was over, why does she have to be on the bed? Why couldn't she be in the couch in the living room with common areas? Why Why does she have to be laying on the bed? You know, it's just it doesn't make sense to me. It's just I don't know.
Erika:And why was he nervous and all that? Yeah. I don't trust that. So the top comment is not the asshole. Your boyfriend never mentioned her before and it's convenient for him to use that as an excuse when there's a person in the office lying in his bed.
Erika:If she needed a place to crash, what his bed not the couch. He knows he has a girlfriend and it's okay for someone else to share a bed with him without giving you a heads up first. Yeah. Exactly. So I don't really think there's really a chance that he's he was so he he was so untruth.
Erika:So that so what's the final burg for you? You think she's an asshole, though?
Edgar:No.
Erika:I don't think so either. I think she should follow her gut. That's all the stories we have today. Thank you for tuning in this week's episode. Check out our website, www.yappings.com.
Erika:And join our mail list for updates. If you love our podcast and want to support us, subscribe and share to your friends and family, we would appreciate it so much.
Edgar:Also we started a new Facebook group called AITA Relationships and Family Drama linked in the description. Join so you can share a mighty asshole post you like or share your own stories for us all to judge. We may even read a few posts in one of our episodes.
Erika:Thank you for joining us. Bye!
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